Oktobre

 

How's life in Denver? It's busy, but I'm ready to get back to writing! It's working late most days and not knowing when to take a lunch. It's finding friendship in a roomie when you feel like you might not have anyone else. It's drinking too much and being happy a friend of a friend is enough of a friend to walk you home. It's missing home everyday and wondering how you're going to survive until Christmas without your family. It's missed Skype dates with your girlfriends because you're on a real ""date."" 

 

It's just everything. I can't say it's been easy, it's been tough, some days are really hard and all I want to do is go home to what I still think of as my real bed, back home. Most nights I wish I were putting on sandals and running to grab wings with my four best girlfriends back home. Things are so different and it's scarier now than it was a few months ago. But. Survival. Right!

 

I've had time to settle, to learn my way home without Google maps, to put up décor on my walls. I'm home and I still don't have enough hangers.

 

In other news I finally spoke to my ex boyfriend about what happened to us. It's different knowing I live far enough to end everything in my mind. It ended so long ago, but now the real settling feeling of not being there, right there, just in case. I'm tired of just in case, but it's so comforting. Things are a mile a minute in my head, I've over thought so much in the last year, and I'm so tired of thinking, wondering, wishing, waiting... is that Jack Johnson coming through my fingertips?

I'm happy though. I'm not whole, not by a billion, but I'm happy. I'm happy about the mountains, about the plane ticket to take me home for the holidays, about my roommate, and girlfriends, I'm happy that I finally asked questions, that I received answers, and I'm happy that my new bed feels nothing like my old bed. 

Ah Sweet Sheets.

Dress & Sunnies: H&M

You know those moments when you lay in your bed, on fresh sheets, with your whole life in order? I had that moment last night.

I was surrounded by order and had just made a cup of tea. There's something about having a cup of tea or coffee in a moment where all things are in order and there's nothing to worry about; It's the ultimate definition of serenity.

I find these moments a lot more since I started doing yoga. Yeah, I know, I know... seems so cliche and annoying, but I get it now. After years of "trying" yoga and hating it, I get it. I accept that the stretching is much more and I have really come to understand Shavasana.

I used to get so pissed at the end of Yoga class because I knew I couldn't just up and leave before the teacher told us to lay on our back and close our eyes. How am I suppose to do that?! I just did a really hard work out and moved in ways my body should not move, now you want me to lay for HOW MANY MINUTES? 5?! Relax my tongue? How does one even relax a tongue? One day, I finally relaxed my tongue. I get the peacefulness that comes with letting it go, swimming in a sea of thoughts, floating away from those thoughts, and breathing. Who knew breathing was so important?

So... I like yoga and laying in a bed of fresh sheets with a cup of hot tea. Who am I?! It's almost as great as buying a new dress... ah, there she is!

(no subject): Writing It Down

Sometimes I feel like I should write everything down, the memories, the people, the trips! I should vow to always remember them sincerely and in their moment, their specific moment.

It's crazy the times you sit and just remember and are in awe of the kindness that was/is shown to you by people. I feel so blessed (and I hate when people use that word). I have come across people that I will know forever and some I will never speak to again, I've gone on trips, I've hopped on planes, driven to Chicago on a whim. These are things I'll always remember and these are people I'll always find in my heart. What's funny is it doesn't end and the friendships never stop, the trips don't end, the excitement continues. That's the good in it, yanno?

Today I'm just so happy. 

Weekend life [mostly]according to iPhone

1&2) Remember that baby I welcomed Friday?! 

3) Saturday was a good hair day

4) Photo taken by GlassJarPhotography

5-8) Hot wings with babez

9) Milly likes to be in the way

10) Cousin Rachel! Sweet baby girl.

11) Milly in cuddle mode

12 & 13) Rachel and  (happy!!) Trace! He just started smiling, and I was taking far too many pictures.

14 & 15) ASOS & H&M// Need & need now.

Welcome home, Eli.

You know that moment when you're just so overcome with pure joy and happiness for someone? It doesn't happen as much as you'd hope, but when it does... when you feel it... it's amazing and takes over your heart. I woke up at 3 am to this on my phone...

Last night one of my best friends had her baby; he's a 7.5 pound, 18 inch, healthy baby boy. I can't tell you how happy I am for her. She's going to be an amazing mother and I cannot wait to spoil this little turd. He has no idea how many people are in love with him.

Seriously, you guys I started CRYING when I opened my phone. I don't even know myself anymore. I'm a puddle. I do know, all the sudden (as in the last few weeks), I have reconsidered my "on the fence about children" thoughts... and then this guy happened and my heart... I don't know! But I can't steal this baby, she's one of my best friends, you guys... but he's so perfect, I want him.

If you hadn't guessed, this is why my heart is so overcome with joy and happiness today. I'm just so... happy and in love... I can't even think how his mom, Sarah, must feel.

on the weekend-go

Nashville was great. Did minimal shopping (yes, still budgeting), ate bar food, ate housewarming party food, played drinking games. Always a great time in Nashville, you all know this!     

In other news, I've been wearing too much legging as pant, not washing my hair, or doing it for that matter. I'm lucky to have my job for a few reasons, one being my lack of motivation to really wear real clothes. Having a job provides that extra boost on most days. Also I regret not buying that coffee mug; I've honestly never regretted something so much. 

;) ;) ;-)

Blazer: H&M// Button Up: Converse (Target)// Cardigan: Aerie// Pants: H&M// Boots: Gianni Bini (eBay)

No, I don't have lice, I just have no idea what to do with my hands, ever; I mean I'm already setting up a self timer on my camera (aka iPhone) and trying to get a shot without a tree growing out of my head (mission 2: failed). On top of everything I just like to sleep and most the time these photos are taken in a haste, so that's why there's a tree growing out of my head and i'm pretending I have lice. 

In other news, I witnessed the sweetest thing ever this morning. A little man-toddler and his mom were walking into my building and the little man ran in front of his mom and I, said, "I'm the man!" and held the door open. I coo'ed and awe'd and almost cried. I should get back on birth control immediately. NO ONE COME NEAR ME. I don't even like the idea of having kids that much, but when they do little real people things like open doors and wear little ties I just can't help but stop everything, curl up in a ball, and cry. If a little, real-person boy could change my car oil and rotate my tires, I'd probably be insane. Once (about 3 years ago) I was at Target and heard two babies giggling simultaneously and my ovaries went cray-zy. They were jumping around, knockin' shit over... yes, my ovaries.

Speaking of which, I had my annual yesterday and if I can't talk about it on my blog then I don't know why I have a blog. I will talk about my vagina here! I WILL. Firstly, my employer hasn't switched over yet, so I'm STILL paying for birth control (RUDE AS HELL), but my visit was free, so that's cool, I guess (still pissed about the BC though). I like my lady-part maintenance being a given, for real. My gyno also made a few "small" jokes whilst poking around; I love my doctor and the fact that if I laugh and the metal junk falls out my personal junk, it's her fault.

And it's Friday! See you all in December (OV VEY!).

Best-

Amber

Row Tide!*

So, I love being outside. I love walking, hiking, just getting out, especially in the type weather we've (the South) had as of late. Sunny and 65-75! That's one of the things the South and I agree on: green stuff.

I've fessed up to my love of Nashville, TN, but I'm blanking on if I've mentioned Chattanooga, TN. I spent a good deal of time up there last fall, and this fall I was excited to get back and play. I stayed with a couple friends and made a weekend of what was suppose to be a day. Snapped a few shots, of course.

It was an amazing weekend to be in Chattanooga with great friends I hadn't seen in awhile. One of the many great things about Chattanooga is the drive; you hit TN and you get lost in a sea of trees, probably one of the easiest drives I make.

Signal Mtn. Hiked part of the Cumberland trail on Saturday.

My long legged tour guide through the trails, had a time trying to keep up.

Drank coffee to this view Sunday morning. I could get used to that.

Row Competition Saturday after the trails. Row Tide!* 

BWag and I putting our beer faces on before the races.

*Not an Roll Tide fan, I'm not opposed to Row Tide because well, gotta support the rowing team, y'all!

Polka Dots

Welp, it happened. I found the perfect dress. And to think I wasn't even going to leave my house last night. See I made this huge order to Forever 21 last week~ish and when all was said and done and in my grip it was all too big (other than the sequin dress- Thank goodness). So, last night the bug hit me and I drove up to the mall.

It went a little like this: "Too big, too short, weird fabric... I'm leaving... polka dots?... Oh, dress...I bet it's a large, it's a small... hm..." When I put this dress on, YOU GUYS, I couldn't contain my excitement. It's not just because it's a great fitting dress, it's because of the polka dots and the length. I have been looking for this dress for about a year, I wanted classic cut with a higher waistline and I kind of wanted to not spend $300.00. This dress was $19.00. IT WAS $19.00. I know how excited you guys are, I can feel it. This is a huge day.

So I give you... Polka Dot Dress:

Dress: F21// Cardigan: Old Navy// Shoes: Target

I am so excited about fall.

I really enjoy cool mornings and when the sun is shines, but doesn't burn my skin. I like boots and a good pumpkin ale. I remember driving through Tennessee a lot in the fall. Alabama is great, but I find a portion of my heart always lingering in Tennessee. I have met such great people in Tennessee and the fall colors seem to be brighter in Tennessee, and the air crisper. I have such fond memories of that state and I visit less and less, until lately. Lately, I am getting my fix of the Tennessee air, when I'm there I feel at home, I know the roads, the place that makes the best egg sandwich, the church that makes me feel most welcome, and the location of the best record store. I love my home town, do NOT get me wrong, I am so lucky to have been brought up in such a great place and surrounded by only the best people ever, but I can't say my itch to visit Tennessee is ever gone.

Someone once told me to visit Maine in the fall, every fall I think about this(see above photo). Maine in the fall has become somewhat of an unforgettable lyric to me. I can't unthink it and every year I want to see it more. So my vow is to visit Maine in the fall before I turn 28; that gives me a good 3 years to get there, which gives me 3 falls to wish... maybe 2, whatever! Maybe I'll just go this fall.

Until then, I'll just continue to wear my boots and eat my egg sandwiches, but I won't take my drives through Tennessee for granted anymore. I'll stop and look at the trees and I'll drink my coffee outside, maybe I'll even buy a record player.

Michelle Obama looking amazing, being amazing...

BTW... this was perfect. She did such a great job! She's a natural.

Are you keeping up with the election? I didn't get a chance to watch much of the Republican speeches last week, so I'm antsy to catch up on that over the next week!